Reality Is a Harsh Mistress

I finally have to admit out loud that I've lost my Camille necklace. This makes me upset beyond belief.

I don't even quite know how I lost it. Rather, I have a pretty good idea HOW, just not WHEN. It just makes me feel stupid, and sick, and sad.

Flashback to last week: I decided I needed a new purse to cheer me up. While it wasn't the price of a Coach bag, it was more than I'd averaged on my Payless employee-discounted purses.

Mid-Saturday morning, one of the side braids popped off. Being the practical gal I am, I refused to keep a defective bag, given its expense.

Saturday was a busy day (birthday weekend and all!), but it was also the day I was determined to do my exchange, as I was going out with the girls that night. (Oy, my head just throbbed in rememberance! : P)

So I think between switching purses three times (couldn't decide what backup purse was sparky enough for the occasion, you know), the lawn and garden show, my hair appointment, the purse return, a jaunt to Lawrence since our Target didn't have the one I wanted, then out with the girls (and this was all after noon, mind you!)

... I've managed to lose my amethyst pendant necklace. Which I really freaking need right now, since my brain is running about a bazillion miles an hour.

I even remember as I was changing bags, or rummaging through one, telling myself "you should put that on. You've had it on almost ever day since she's been gone. Put it on, or put it in the house, or you'll lose it."

You probably wouldn't be surprised to find I don't always heed my own advice. I'm stubborn like that.

Right now, I just feel like crying. Yes, I realize the world is not going to come to an end, and I know the Goddess would not be offended... but I still feel awful. It's just one more piece of her I've lost, and one more reminder of how much I miss her.

Damnit